Being in my twenties sounds so incredibly glamorous. I literally daily occasionally am super uber thankful that I'm no longer a teenager, because to be honest, being a teenager was downright exhausting. Now that I'm in my twenties I must actually attune myself to responsibility and adulthood.... EW... But in all seriousness folks, being a teenager is difficult. We all know it. No matter what course you take in life, the teen years really hit hard. Sorry if this entire post is TMI and a tad emo. I was a teenager after all!But seriously. Don't judge. You had stuff like that too! This idea was inspired by Nicole. I didn't want to seem all creative on my own, but she doesn't have a copyright or anything. She really should.
So... whew... here goes!!
spoiler; there is a large amount of repetitiveness. feel free to skim
Turn 13. Be ecstatic that you're finally a teenager. Start dreaming up perfect prom experience. Get first real kiss. Run to the bathroom and wash face repeatedly. Go to first dance. Freak out because you don't know how to dance. Be awkward. Dance. Have first "boyfriend". Write in diary. Start getting hormonal. Get first "camp boyfriend". Write in diary in code.
Turn 14. Enjoy the feeling of maturity. Think about camp boyfriend. Write "Me+Camp Boyfriend forever" with hearts all over your journal. Go to school. Get note- "Cute Boy likes you". Think about cute boy. Forget about Camp Boyfriend. Write "Me+Cute Boy forever" with hearts all over your journal. Get grounded for the first time. Be angsty. Get first sex talk. Freak out. Hear where the condoms are. Freak out more. Get new secret boyfriend. Get broken up with for pretty more sexually experienced mature friend. Be pissed. Write about it on Myspace and in journal.
Turn 15. Enter high school. Go to all girls school because that's what parents wanted.Be sick of girls. Emo (lather, rinse, repeat). Think about friend's neighbor. See his motorcycle, muscles, and hair. Enjoy. Give number. Get first real boyfriend. Say "I love you". Believe it. Experience first high school backstabbing. Repeat backstabbing. Have romantic "perfect love" adventures. Drink. Fuck up. Experience first heartbreak. Lose friends. Love more. Transfer high schools. Be hit on. Feel weird. Try to be invisible. Sing in front of the whole school instead. Fail at invisibility. Wish you could just turn sixteen.
Turn 16. Get sweet sixteen jewelry . Get birth control for the first time. Discover more estrogen makes you a super bitch. Don't have birth control. Freak out. Repeat. Get first promise ring. Throw promise ring. Feel empowered. Go back to boyfriend anyway. Freak out about prom. Don't go to prom. Freak out about not going to prom. Miss middle school. Cry. Break up. Get angry at mom for letting you watch all those Disney movies glorifying love. Cry more. Feel empowered. Get back together. Repeat. A lot. Go on vacation with boyfriend's family. Love it. Hate it. Don't like his family. Feel bad. Break up. Get back together.
Turn 17. Go out of the country for the first time. With parents. Drink with parents for the first time. Like mom while drinking. Feel weird drinking around dad. Call boyfriend every waking minute. Sulk. Hot spiced wine. Experience first bar. Gross. Write junior paper. Do excellently. Break up. Cry. Get back together. Be angry. Go to prom. Think prom sucks. Go home. Break up. Flirt way into getting driver's license. Have first summer single in a while. Enjoy it too much. Feel bad. Feel good. Feel bad. Repeat. Get back together with now-college boyfriend. Feel like an adult.
Turn 18. Spend time with your girls. Feel good. Apply to colleges. Get in. Have intense "What College" discussions. Go to Southern California . Break up. Cry. Feel weird about moving. Graduate. Feel weird about graduating. Feel happy about being a legal adult. Feel bad about not being a 21-year-old legal adult. Go out of the country again (without parents). Have the best time of your life. Realize you can't do that forever. Wish you could. See ex-boyfriend. Get back together. Go to SoCal. Feel inadequate. Make the best friends ever. Drink. Study. Live. Talk to boyfriend. Break up. Cry less. Assume cycle will repeat as usual. Boyfriend gets new girlfriend. Feel weird. Feel free. Be happy for the first time in a long time. Go home. Miss friends.
Turn 19. Best friend sets you up with Handsome Boy. Be a little slutty. Don't feel bad. Hang out more with Handsome Boy and friends. Enjoy. Say yes to being his girlfriend. Be happy. Go on first real vacation with a boyfriend (without family). Enjoy. Have amazing summer with Handsome Boy and friends. Transfer schools. Miss best friends. Drink. Freak out. Go to new school. Meet five new roommates. Be awkward. Party with roommates. Be best friends. Have drama with roommate. Be petty. Talk shit. Get called out. Yell. Fix. Repeat. Get best grades you've ever had. Get broken up with. Cry. Sob. Party. Drink. Wish you could just fast forward to thirty and have everything "figured out".
Enter: TWENTY.
..... to be continued.
~Forever Yours
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