Captain Kirk's Nipples

Season Premiere

2011-08-21T23:13:00.000-07:00

In case anyone was curious, it has been practically a year since I last posted. Though I think the only curious person would be me, as I have had so many experiences and thoughts that it's very curious I didn't have anything to fully publicly say about anything...

To start you off, this blog is craving some updated mancandy.

Bet you'd like this Thor to use his hammer on you (haaaaaa)

And what's a man without his attractive younger brother, eh?

Found THIS after digging through his Miley couple's pics *coulddobetter*

That should suffice for now. Please, refrain from drooling on your keyboards, it's quite a mess to clean up and I'm pretty sure Geek Squad doesn't cover that...

"Whatever, I got this. I'm the Geek Squad, bitches."

Now, in the past year, these are the things that I have either been addicted to, or have discovered and LOVE. Judge away, folks.

Merlin- Literally, my new favorite show. If you're the type of person who loves mythology or fantasy and also Disney movies, this show takes the cake. It's a Disney-fied (with no actual Disney and horrid special effects) interpretation of the store of Merlin and Arthur when they were young and growing up. The story centers around Merlin accommodating to his "destiny" of protecting Arthur's life. It's pretty damn awesome.

Chocolate- Could have to do with my job at I-won't-say-where, but I have discovered some incredible things that I didn't know could be mixed with chocolate. Pumpkin spice truffles, anything salted caramel, blackberries in dark chocolate, raspberry hot cocoa... I could go on, but it's making me drool more than I do looking at the man-candy. Long story short, chocolate turns me into a purring kitten by a fireplace. Soooooooooo happy.

Florence + the Machine- Here's a good one

A Capella- I don't have any updated videos of my group, but we've covered quite a few awesome songs. Inspiration here plz.
Dexter

Need I say more?

My Major- Oh Psychology, how I love thee. I won't count the ways. If there is anything in my life that influences 99% of what I do, Psychology would be that thing. Psychology essentially takes everything that I care about and everything I believe in and condenses it into a little educational pile that I get to dig my hands into. Even sarcasm involves a good level of psychobabble and manipulation of the audience. At the same time, explanations for passion, love, anger, fear, emotion, and more are all embedded in studies of the brain. One of the most interesting tidbits I'd read this past year had to do with those who were previously thought to have brain injuries that could not be repaired utilized natural methods to reverse their situation and revert them to a natural state. Book recommendations follow:

Now that I have successfully bored the bejeezus out of you, it's time to peace out. I think I'll leave you with something stupidly funny from http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/

~Forever Yours

Collarbones and the Brits

2010-09-21T19:29:00.000-07:00

Recently, I have been absent from blogging, because I was busy "orienting" transfer students at my university. Thankfully, I had a particularly interesting group, including a BRITISH TRANSFER!!!!! I was absolutely enthralled with his accent at first, which hasn't actually changed quite yet. My friends and I had him reading sleazy pickup lines, and no matter how absolutely "abysmal" they were, he still sounded polite. Imagine a British man, sauntering up to you, and saying "If you can dance, you have my hand, but if you can sing, you have my heart. I hope to God you can't sing because I just wanna fuck you." Much less disgusting than if you imagine this said by an Oregonian. Nothing against them, I do happen to be one of them. Fascinating, isn't it? Almost as fascinating as THIS


Every day, hope to be this.

With this wonderfully entertaining Brit, I discussed erogenous zones, and the particularly ignored ones. While he taught me one thing, I believed I could have taught him many things. Don't you worry, this was VERBAL teaching. Not like that Red Bull commercial where the girl and guy "study anatomy".We discovered, as my title suggests, that collarbones are a surprisingly sensual section of the body, commonly forgotten when mentioning the most obvious ones (neck, ear, etc.). I'll compile a list, feel free to add.

Neck

Collarbone

Ear

Hip

Inner thigh

Stomach (not recommended for the insecure)

Ankle (if you're into that kind of thing)

Nape of neck

Shoulder (back)

Lower back

... and all the obvious ones. The SERIOUSLY obvious ones.


Lips and Boobs. Obvious ones.

Well now that you're all "oiled up and ready to go", I have a wonderful sexalicious eye-candy for you.

As well as a little smidgen of secret information... I have now successfully written and/or composed three songs!!!! Coming soon, I promise. Just gotta find the right materials and such.

Mm MM mm. Talk about a beautiful man.

~Forever Yours

Disney Developments and Pre-Menstrual Musings

2010-08-17T20:25:00.000-07:00

G'day old chaps!

In your case, I'm hoping the definition refers to a "fellow" and not a "cheek", "chewing tobacco", or "a village in the tehsil of Kaloorkot in Bhakka". To be completely honest, I don't know what a tehsil is. Sounds much like a tassel in my head, so I'm assuming the definition is referring to some sort of rug.

Obviously.

I am currently in TWO competitions with one of my friends. The first competition involves losing a noticeable amount of weight before December rolls around. Loser buys the winner drinks all night. Now, if I win, technically I get very drunk and if my friend looks good anyways, regardless of the fact that he is the loser, there could possibly be more than one winner. We have found ourselves in a conundrum! Maybe loser buys winner dinner would be a safer bet.

Bet number TWO is that I cannot identify any Disney song. Barring the new Princess and The Frog soundtrack, I can in fact place Disney songs and correct lyrics. For example, the original Aladdin film's opening song possessed the lyrics "Where they cut off your ear if they don't like your face, it's barbaric, but hey, it's home!" After the Politically Correct obsession infected the masses, the lyrics were changed to "Where it's flat and immense and the heat is intense, it's barbaric, but hey, it's home!" You know what I have to say to that? I don't like Rosie O'Donnel's face. I'm sure she was a part of this decision, and I highly disapprove of ANY changes to Disney movies. I don't care how much Walt hated Jews, his work was pure magic.


I learned a lot from Disney Princesses....

If I were watching a Disney movie right now, say Beauty and the Beast, I would probably cry when she thinks the Beast is dead. Why, you ask? A lovely thing plaguing most of the non-athletic females of our genus, PMS. (Did the coloring make you uncomfortable? It was supposed to...) Anyway, on this note I choked up while watching the proposal scene in Ella Enchanted in which Anne Hathaway's character overcomes her curse of obedience in order to save the delicious delight that is Hugh Dancy. Take a gander, you'll enjoy it. If you enjoy a beautiful male face that is.

Well, there goes your eye candy for the day...
I'm only joking, of COURSE you will get some eye-watering beauty. But before that, we must further discuss life. PMS aside, being a girl is absolutely lovely. I once had a nightmare that I had a penis, and I woke up and cried. No offense to you men out there who have a huge penis ego, I just really would hate to be a man. While I would love some modern examples of chivalry, I don't know if I could open doors and pull out chairs for women, and be expected to pay for everything. No wonder men make more money, they have to pay on the dates with women! It's the cultural expectation. Women can't have ALL the money in the world.
Man, I am pissing off feminists by the second right now. Well, if you're going to get offended, there must be some truth in my statement, because otherwise you would just think I was completely mad. (I seem to be in a British mood today)

Oh dear. Well, ta ta for now! Here's a sexalicious picture to heal your eyes of the previous calamity.

~Forever Yours

Self-Serving Media

2010-06-30T23:18:00.000-07:00

I can assure you, this post will make you uncomfortable. Your coping device may be laughing, ceasing to read, or generally turning off your internet service for fear of infiltration of my impure words and thoughts.

Just kidding. I'm not talking about the kind of self-service that tools can provide (pureromance.com). Oh no, this is the kind of self-service where I provide myself with some sort of ridiculous life story, without any real direction. I seem to float along with my eyes closed and my heart open, flitting from situation to situation with the energy and frivolity of a hummingbird. Life experiences are my sugar-water, and I crave so much. This insatiable need to know gets me in a minor amount of trouble at times. Don't believe me? Here are a few examples of my favorite mishap memories.

Coronado Beach, California, Halloween 2009. Need I say more? Oh but of course I do.

In this lovely environment, it seems I had found myself in a dizzying plethora of corsets

and pant-less belligerence. While attempting to reach the destination of a Halloween bash,

my friends and I quickly found ourselves in dire need of a restroom... and map. With

an invite from some anonymous Marines, a bathroom, social circle, and drinks

were quickly attained. Post roofie-scare (silly, in fact), one particular friend commenced

a stripping of pants to "be one with the ocean". Needless to say, the security guard

was not amused. The end of the night came, minus one *ahem* preoccupied friend

and one wallet and one bottle of Malibu Rum, and we proceeded to continue on with

our seemingly mundane lives.

Oregon, Fall 2010, "Pimps and Hos". Yet again, it seems to be self-explanatory. Allow me

to continue. Classing it up in order to present a decent impression at the first party

of my new school, I sauntered into the party full of José Cuervo and confidence

that my white tiger print tunic would not reveal any breasteses or va-jay-jay. However,

I was sauntering around in my self-labeled "hooker heels". Dangerous, yet damn sexy.

It was "pimps and hos" after all. What I didn't take into account was the rickety steps

of the college student's house, or the salience of alcohol in my blood. Eventually,

these three forces (shoes, stairs, smirnoff) took hold of my universe, and sent

it tumbling down– or me, rather. A lovely swollen ankle/foot resulted, allowing me to

sustain my very first alcohol-related injury. Lovely, of course.

San Diego, California, Fall 2009. I won't disclose the location for fear of open

accessibility to everything on the internet, but may I first put a disclaimer

for any/all my readers out there. SECRET SHOTS ARE BAD NEWS BEARS. You

think I'm joking, but I am absolutely serious. If you're going to take shots,

don't do it in private. It's not about luck, it's about not going home as the complete

~~fucktard~~ idiot who drank way too much and lost complete control. This is

exactly what they talk about in those commercials, except I'm not telling you alcohol is bad,

just an excess could be... negative. Long story short, me+secret shots+decisions made

while blacked out= a very late night and a hospital visit. No, there was no stomach

pumping or alcohol poisoning. Just a little too much for my frail little figure to handle.

Regardless, this is still one of my favorite stories to tell. I love making mistakes sometimes.

Well now that you all are thoroughly disappointed in me, I would love to discuss how my life is a movie at times. Recently, I encountered a person who happened to have not one, not two, but three or more ties to people who are or have been very dear to me. This random new acquaintance was not only tied to an undesirable by way of previous residence, but also through a friendship was tied to one of my dearest friends from California, and therefore secondarily linked with practically the past five to six years of my life. It baffles me how small the world really is. And even after the millionth time I use that phrase, that damned Disney song pops in my head immediately after. Stupid corporation.

I didn't mean it! I love you Disney! You're my lobster!

With all this talk of partying and drinking and living, I do believe I have tired myself out. Back in May, I had explored the world of facebook statuses for a purpose. It just so happened I was with a group of 6 people trying to unravel my night. Going through my gray zone, remembering a policewoman, falling down at the scene of the last falling down accident. The only thing we were missing was a baby and a tiger and then my life would essentially be The Hangover. And then, in all my morning-after glory, I realized the night before was a widespread party. Proof? These facebook statuses;

"My walk of shame was so long that it could have been a parade...at one point I actually considered doing the 'elbow-elbow-wrist-wrist" to passing cars and people." -BV

Apologies to the bathroom.

broken camera.. my life is over.

lost my phone. pretty wack.

What a night

Vodka...... You bitch.

had one helluva night.

I am OK. i got elbowed in the face. but i am fine. no bruises.

DISLIKES being the DD. But Someone HAS to do it. EFFFF.

if you find a set of keys with a seahorse key chain please tell me!!!

shitshow=my life

And to complete this segment, I bring you Kellan Lutz, because I am TEAM EMMET

..... Whoa.

~Forever Yours

Fantasies and Fabulous Bitches

2010-06-13T21:55:00.000-07:00

I had a dream.... A fantasy, rather. John Mayer, mine to have, shirtless and spread out on my silk sheets (which I still don't have) singing to me and being excellent in bed of course. Though, with that face came an expectation of a matching delicious lickable body. Apparently, I overestimated him. I thought with the douchebaggy personality he is apparently famous for, he would make an effort to keep up his physique.
Not so.

Dear John, it looks like you have a Situation

There's a small part of me hoping he's pushing out his stomach in an attempt at humor. Maybe. I guess I could be friends with John. Johnny Boy. Johnnn Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt. That's... not my name. That's not my name.

I could do that alllll day.

I won't.

As a treat to you, since you seem to enjoy me somewhat, or maybe not at all (who cares really), I'll give you an eensy excerpt of "Fabulous Bitches"; the next it book of the century. For serious.

CHAPTER 3 (because it's my lucky number)

Confidence is the Best Revenge

We all know the perky blonde on the Orbit commercials is a fabulous bitch; just listen to her catchphrase! "Dirty Mouth? Clean it up, with Orbit! Fabulous!" We've all had a dirty mouth before, thanks to sloppy seconds and straying sexpots, and cleaning it up seems to be the largest problem following these failed sexual endeavors. How can you get rid of that unpleasant aftertaste following an unsuccessful relationship? One word– Confidence. Easier said than done, of course, but when it comes to confidence, the only person who can access that is YOU. Yes, I have followed you home within this book in a tiny hidden camera, and I have seen your low self-confidence, and I am here to tell you that will not be acceptable if you would like to continue attempting to be a fabulous bitch. The best feeling in the world just happens to be walking past an ex-boyfriend or hookup, and looking/feeling like the star of the show. Put on your best Beyoncé walk ladies, because it's time to bring out your inner DIVA. That discarded "material" will wish you were theirs forever, and at the same time realize you are too much of a fabulous bitch to even care.

Merry Christmas, we got you a FABULOUS BITCH!

With this extraordinarily short entry comes a personal update (code for an excuse to talk about myself a little). I'm spending time learning a couple songs on the piano that I can sing as well, so once I think I'm good enough, y'all are going to see this on YouTube and my blog!! And now for some Eye Candy of the Day. Only because I love you all.

Mmmmm. Summer Sexy.

~Forever Yours

Lust, LadyG, Le Chou.

2010-06-08T22:51:00.000-07:00

Bonsoir mes petits monstres! And what a lovely summer evening it is. I was trying to find some unique catchphrase to get people's attention, a hook if you will, and honestly the French people have so many weird nicknames for each other. Like "chou-chou" for example. "Chou Chou" is around the same status as sweetie, or honey, or muffin, except chou chou means cabbage. That's right. Cabbage. No doubt you would love for your significant to walk in the door, take you in his arms, and whisper softly as he gazes lucidly into your eyes– "I love you, cabbage". I'm just going to put this out there, and say that I'm not a fan.

Nom?

Something I am a fan of is art. I happen to regard myself as an amateur art connoisseur. Basically I love all types of art, but only know a tad more about like drawing and singing. Less about all the other types of art. But I still appreciate widely. Lady Gaga may be a half-psychotic sick hypnotic fabulous bitch, but she's also a very provocative artist. For example, her new video Alejandro is seriously smashing. I love it. I'm a little addicted to her. There was this one article saying that someone named some baggy of drug after her. I could totally be making that up. But, because I love you all, here is the link

Seriously, just watch it. In my personal opinion, it's a representation of the struggle of humanity to reach this futuristic goal we have set for ourselves, mixed with the potency of Gaga's opinion about female sexuality and the freedoms gained so far. Aren't I the little film critic :)

*I know that we are young and I know you may love me*

Spicy. I have also just discovered this song Brown Skin. Talk about yummy, this is perfect for some chocolate love, if you know what I mean. Of course you know what I mean, otherwise I would have to be monumentally disappointed in you. And we both don't want that.

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT!!

I have decided to make a little list of things I'm lusting after in order to quench those desires a tad. Since none of these things are immediately accessible, admitting to them will most likely give me some sort of release, right? Right.

One. Silky something

Two. A car of my own

Three. An apartment (roommates are okay, parents are not)

Four. Chocolate

Five. Combine 1 and 4, add MAN (if ya get me)

Six. Sunny Beach Vacation

Seven. That Voice

Eight. Brown Summer Boots

Nine. A non-broken phone

Ten. Fall

Okay, I believe I'm done with that. And if I may, no spoilers included, Glee was fantastic, and I should know better than to watch the finale when I'm hormonal. I love good singing voices. They send shivers down my spine and make me melt like putty, and I cannot resist charm+a good singing voice. That combo will have me floored.

Now that I have given you all tools to romance me, I will sign off with this yummy tidbit I fell across on the internet recently in honor of the fantastic Glee finale!

Eyegasmic

~Forever Yours

Being "Muchier".

2010-06-08T02:14:00.000-07:00

Ello mon bébés. I'm sure you missed pleasantly uncreative moi. Sorry I've been on an estrogen/drama kick lately, what with final exams and the constant itch for summer. But I do have a few topics floating around in my head generally, so we'll start off yes?

First of all, I'm praying with everything I have that none of my benefactors (Daddy dearest) finds this blog, specifically this entry. I seem to have dropped my iPhone (no not 3G) a few too many times, and now it won't go on silent, the volume-up button is stuck down, and the vibrate only SOMETIMES works. Yes, Apple, it IS my fault. Sorry I don't want to carry around a clunky icky iPhone case. (Uh oh, poor white girl complainin' about her fancy shmancy iPhone). But seriously, it's super annoying that I'm so irresponsible with my belongings. Apparently that whole "cognitive overload" thing definitely happens with me, I can only handle so much at one time. Don't you DARE "that's what she said" me!

Good LORD I'm spoiled. You all must hate me. Please don't. I'll buy you lunch or coffee or a drink (when I'm 21).

Moving on, there's this other thing that has been bugging me. Apparently, people have these weird first impressions of me. Well, I guess it doesn't bother me, it just baffles me! From what I have been told by pretty much everyone I know, I come off (in class or just walkin' around) as someone of an "innocent" nature. Just like that– "Innocent". innocent. Funsies. I mean, I definitely understand that a girl with brown curly hair who asks questions during class and makes attempts at dressing nicely who says hi to whoever she can COULD be seen as somewhat of a pure and inexperienced individual... But come on. It's me. I like to talk about uncomfortable things, I love to say whatever I want to say and swear like a sailor, and I enjoy the occasional beverage every now and then. I've been told (by the people who know me well) that I could turn into Karen Walker quite easily, after a couple marriages.

Seriously. My life.

But in all seriousness, I don't believe I deserve the title of innocent. I've far proven my... badness...

This doesn't have anything to do with anything, but we're discussing bridal showers and "groomal" showers currently, and I have decided that having Chippendales at a bridal shower is basically like going to a wine tasting when pregnant. It's pure silliness. I have quite a few qualms with the goings on of bridal showers and weddings nowadays. For example, here are a few completely unacceptable wedding accouterments.

Long story short, please just get married with taste. Or just don't invite me. Then I guess my opinion won't matter. But if I am involved in your wedding, you can be damn sure none of this will show up!
Oh good lord, I almost forgot. ManCandy.
Here chu go! Hhhhave a good night my loves.

~Forever Yours

Free Write- Day Two (sort of)

2010-05-16T22:23:00.000-07:00

Your droning noise is not music to my ears and I'm sick and tired of feeling like an apathetic bitch. My increasing levels of estrogen and stress do not fare well with your constant annoyance and disruption. Passive aggressiveness is overrated however, and I am forced to resign my previously determined outspokenness for a kinder facade. Relax though, the more I like myself, the more I'll like you.

And how can I like myself, how can I live with myself whole and happily, when I know I don't deserve him. Sure, you say I deserve the best, the most incredible man in the world. But I know as well as you do that this is hardly true. I want the best, but who wouldn't want their knight in shining armor? My perfect man has the capacity for love, music, and art like Christian in Moulin Rouge, but the passion and fire of any steamy supermarket romance novel, and the cherry on top; the suave and silky confidence of any man worthy to be called James Bond. Funny, I thought I found this man, but it was my overactive imagination that I have since abandoned. I miss the oblivious confidence that the world could just fall into place, and the film that was my life would end effortlessly like any Chick Flick romantic comedy.

I have to clear my head of everything that is polluting and useless. Everything selfish must go. What do I feel? I feel the ocean. I feel soft hands. I need to get away from everything and lay on the beach with my eyes closed, taking in the warmth of the summer evening, listening to the sweet sounds so close now but so far away. You look at me and say you know me, but you never will. With all the words I write, how can you ever know if it is a lie? You can't. Everything is a lie, and what is true is selfish, purely and simply. I'll always dream about that which I can't have, and I'll always regret losing what I would if I followed that dream. I'll be satisfied as I remain stationary until my being cannot take anymore and I find myself in a true lie.

Everyone has a secret; but can they keep it, oh no they can't.

~Forever Yours

Free Write- Day one

2010-05-03T22:42:00.000-07:00

FREEWRITE-- #1
I stand alone in a dark subway as trains race by, brushing the hair out of my face with the force of a strong blow.A light appears from the top of the stairs, beckoning me outside. I follow the light, and find it's snowing, covering the world in a shining white. A faceless man stands across the street, waiting for the opportunity to walk closer. I feel a longing for this unknown man, and I need him but at the same time, I do not want him. I want him to come towards me, but not too close. Oh, hell with it, I let him grab my arm, and suddenly we are alone in a clouded field, dancing slowly. Blankets of silk and the stuff of imaginary clouds encircle us, and I feel safe here. I feel perfect. Home is here. I can walk to the window, and the cushioned seat that juts out the slightest but cradles my figure as I lie down watching the sun set behind the cherry blossom tree in the back yard. As I turn around, I see the candles that this faceless lover has strewn about the room, giving a dusty glow to enhance the reds and pale whites that create our small home. Let me sleep here, I whisper to him, and he embraces me as I fall away from my dream land and back to reality.

This entire endeavor is part of an experiment I am kind of conducting on myself in attempts to improve my writing. I just sit down, put my music on shuffle and write what comes to mind immediately, I write what I see. You should try it, it's great fun, and it's interesting to see what comes up.

Feel free to psychoanalyze. I totally would.

And since you have been so patient with me, here is some EYE CANDY!!!!!!

Creds to PerezHilton. I stole this from his site, so therefore, he can't sue me... Right? Right? God Kellan Lutz is delish

~Forever Yours

Release

2010-05-02T23:18:00.000-07:00

I saw him walking towards me and he smiled but I didn't because I remembered the day that he came to my house and I was angry then and I was angry now and all I could think about was how much shorter he was and how I didn't love him anymore which I couldn't explain because I always loved him when I saw him but here he was and I was seeing him feeling no fireworks or passion yet I was trembling and my brow was furrowed and my palms were cold and wet with anxiety when he said hello and hugged me and I couldn't hug back I felt sick and I wanted him to leave but I couldn't ask him to leave because he was here and all I could do was wait for it to be over to cry but I didn't and the tears fell despite my efforts to conceal my emotions from him because he doesn't deserve my emotions he doesn't deserve anything from me even if he was taking pleasure from the presence of me and he was falling deeper in love with me even though I knew that was a waste of his time but time was not his concern as he asked me everything about my life specifically the life I've worked so hard to rebuild after he destroyed everything and took everything and wanted everything and told me I was nothing which is what I felt the entire time I was there I felt nothing except the overwhelming wave of change that became finally real and that was when I knew it was really over and my heart had changed for good.

the future is bright

Sometimes the worst decisions can bring you to a wonderful place.

A place where the air is light and free

Giving life to the forgotten beauty

The lightest Spring rain falls on my shoulders

And I am reborn.

Ah... We Meet Again

2010-03-29T00:47:00.000-07:00

I've found that while not blogging, I was missing a piece of myself. Hey piece of me, come back! You're wanted here.

Many things have happened, though insignificant in my cyberworld full of "privacy". You know, people pronounce that word strangely sometimes. My professor from England pronounces is prih-vuh-see. I like that better than pry-va-see. It makes me sound more sophisticated when I put on a little British drawl before the day is out. Damn my flea-sized attention span. As I was saying, cyberprivacy. Doesn't exist. Let's move on from that.

Apparently my roommates forget sometimes that animated films (or films in general, rather) do not follow the normal pattern of life. While they are willing to unquestioningly accept the fantastical twists and turns of Buffy; The Vampire Slayer (though poorly enhanced), they cannot comprehend small bugs breaking into chorus for a verse of "In The Dark of the Night"(Anastasia), or why Ursula in George of the Jungle wears makeup while trapped in the deep of Africa. We have been watching a lot of Buffy, we actually just finished the season. And may I say, what the hell happened to all the ugly vampire stuff??? I feel like by making vampires sexy and super-appealing and fantastic lovers etc. etc. the media is teaching people to embrace danger because it's beautiful. It's like Beauty and the Beast but worse. And I know this is another rant, but wouldn't Edward not be able to be around Bella when she was on her period? Men normally don't like women that PMS, so at first, he wouldn't spend her whole PMS week with her, and then when she was hangin' out with Aunt FLO, he would be like "I'm out". Unless of course she was taking those birth control pills that prevent your period for a while. Oh wait, OBVIOUSLY NOT, because SPOILER ALERT she has his baby. His murderous vampire baby. Inside her. With all her blood. Inside her. Getting my point? Or maybe I don't have one *insert devious smile here*

True story. That was Meyer's first ending, but it didn't go over well with her publishers.

Oh dear. there I have gone again.

I guess I should give a heads up that this blog entry will be pointless and frazzled, but if that's what you like... well then baby, I'll give it to you *sensual stare*... *creepy stare*...

Blogs should really come with videotapes so I can make faces. But virtual ones so people wouldn't be able to creep and see my ACTUAL face. I guess it doesn't matter much, hm?

I invite all of you to search through your old papers, journals, notes, blogs, etc. and think about yourself during that period of time. I just found this blog that I completely forgot about, and on it I posted multiple poems that (though I was in a really bad point of my life) were absolutely fantastic. Not to toot my own horn or anything, but these poems are ridiculously soulful and eloquent, it's awesome. Even looking at things from a year ago, I find I'm an entirely different person. And somehow I'll always love me some animated films... ANASTASIA FTW!!!!!

"He didn't take the money"

And because I've tired myself out and my computer is inches away from death, I have concluded that I will just cut myself off with some vintage Eye Candy of the Day

Thank YOU Marlon Brando

-Forever Yours

"You're a flock" and other awkward things I do/ say

2010-02-02T10:04:00.000-08:00

Things I'm going to talk about today; Evil Twins, My Friends/ Roommates, Sex.

If you don't like it, you may go. Thank you for the brief view, and I hope you enjoy your mundane, and ridiculously miserable existence. (I was joking, I love you all).

Awwwwwwww

Evil Twin. Do I haz one? I don't think I'm evil enough to be the twin, or good enough to be the good twin and have an evil twin. However, it does happen to be ~~doppleganger~~ ~~dopelgan~~ doppelganger week on Facebook. Something that only makes a little sense, because doppelganger means evil twin, I'm pretty sure, and celebrities would not necessarily be my evil counterpart. I beg to differ, I would most likely be the evil half. Definitely the more awkward twin. Apparently my doppelganger is Anne Hathaway, but if she is my doppelganger, then I'm definitely the evil awkward twin. Damn.

My friends and I have concluded that I am the epitome of awkward. No, you wouldn't think so just meeting me or seeing me on the street somewhere. But after I come to your house party, be blatantly wasted in my own fashion (the dancing, giggly, touchy-feely way. Yes I'm the girl you hate at parties), continue to knock over your large house plant that is a little larger than me, and unsuccessfully try to lift it back up, THEN you realize how awkward I am. Or maybe I see a cute guy, a guy that I may have been crushing on for longer than I've crushed on someone since high school, and I pull a Ginny and get all wide-eyed and look like some sort of fish. But a fish that has a crush on someone, and can't talk after. Or maybe I decide that my inability to say no means I have to snap at people for them to understand that I don't feel like talking or hanging out with them, then I feel bad and explain myself only to find out they didn't think I was being rude, but now they definitely do. You get the point. I'm miserably awkward, though only because I think I am. So if I could take a little self-confidence pill with a side of swagger, I could get over this whole "oh... eh.... ummmm... hah" awkward attitude I have going on. My FRIENDS, though they make fun of me a huge amount, are equally as awkward. For example, just this morning, here is a conversation.

Roommate 1: I'm going to class now, see you guys later

Me : Ok see you later! Bye!!

Roommate 2: Hello! Oh.. Wait...

Then there's this conversation

Me: What did you just say?

Roommate 1: Jeez, don't you have ears?

Me: I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm not a bionic listener! 'I'm sorry I'm not poor! I'm sorry I don't have a fat ass!' (see Just Friends)

Roommate 2: That's actually what my name means

Roommate 1: Fat Ass?

Oh the times we have.

Pure Romance parties. Those are a blast. I would outline the multiple awkward moments there, but that would probably take much too much thought or space on my blog, so I'll refrain. Though I will say, as read-up as I am on a lot of sexual situations and as experienced as I may be, there are things there I haven't even thought of using. Like this for example

This is Bling Bling. You can purchase him here:Buy Me!!!

I , however, do not want to stick something that looks vaguely like something you could buy at Disneyland in my hoo-ha. AND, there is an animal that tickles your go-button. Isn't that some weird form of plastic bestiality? And wouldn't one be afraid that if one used said machinery wrong, those little tiny metal balls would spill out and be stuck inside your lady parts forever? I would know about metal balls being stuck in weird places, and my "jewelry box" definitely doesn't need any weird foreign items in there. I'll take the real thing, thank you.

Okay now I feel the need to explain the metal balls thing so people don't go "dayum, this chick is wack" (though I don't think anyone I know would say that). I got my conch pierced, and because that sounds like some awkward dirty place as well, I'm including a picture for you piercing virgins.

The rainbow ball thing= conch piercing

So, I had this in, and I fell asleep at my then-boyfriend's house. When I woke up I realized it was time for work, and I started rushing to get all my crap together. Then I proceeded to touch my ear, and find out that while the bar was still in my ear, the little metal ball that holds it all together was missing. I was in too much of a hurry to feel my way around the carpet for it, so I just hopped in my car and drove home. Every other morning before work, I cleaned my ears. I know people say you shouldn't put Q-tips in your ears or whatever, but meh, I did anyway. However, I noticed my right ear (conch ear) was particularly difficult to clean, and hurt when I tried to clean it. Then it became increasingly more difficult to hear. Obviously I freaked out and tried to look into my ear, drawing the conclusion that the tiny metal ball from my piercing had migrated inside my ear canal. Ew. So, I went to the doctor, and long story short, after bringing in a student to observe, they took reaalllllly long forceps and got the stupid meal ball out of my ear. The doctor then asked if I wanted the icky, earwaxy, stupid metal ball back. My response was "Are you kidding. You just got that out of my ear. No."

With that, have a wonderful day y'all

~Forever Yours

7 Deadly Sins

2010-01-28T00:16:00.000-08:00

Ugh. My formatting isn't working :(

Let's form a checklist, shall we?

Gluttony

Lust

Wrath

Envy

Pride

Sloth

Greed

Well I guess I've done everything on my to-do list so far. How about things to do before I'm 30? Not counting the good ol' homey "get married/ have kids/ be successful" schtick. You go ahead and think up some of your own. Feel free to tell me as well, I love reading stories and such :)

Ride in a hot air balloon

Own a pair of Christian Loubotin pumps

Meet a celebrity face-to-face

Sing at a karaoke bar

Save someone's life

Fly in first class

Be kissed in a different country

Be a bridesmaid

Sew a pretty dress

Raise a puppy without the help of my parents

Peace Corps

Barbecue a steak

Visit Hawaii

Draft a novel

Yep. That's my list.
Being on American Idol almost made my list, but I watched the auditions today. Literally super painful to watch the bad ones, and intimidating to watch the incredible ones. I've decided I couldn't handle celebrity life, I do too many questionable things and have too little control over my brain-to-mouth nerves that the paparazzi would literally tear me apart. Maybe I could be the next trainwreck Britney Spears? Tara Reid? Octomom? Nope, went too far there. I would have to delete my facebook, my twitter, possibly this blog, and wipe out my old/current phone and computer. And kill everyone I know. Because they all know too much about me for my famousity. I would prefer to not. Though I've violated ALL of the 7 deadly sins, I have not broken all of the Ten Commandments. It's why I'm pro at being a Jew rather than being a Christian. Plus Jews don't believe in hell, so there you go, I feel much better now.
Speaking of heaven and hell and other conflicting things, how disappointing is this?

Guyliner works.Don't care what you think.

Not disappointing at all you might think? Wrong. This is Lance Bass. The openly (and taken) gay member of N'Sync. I don't think I've seen a straight man wear eyeliner this well. Probably because of the straight thing. This may sound weird, and bear with me, but I would totally have a sex change for Lance Bass. But only if he looked like that picture ALL THE TIME. Actually that's gross. I would never want to have boy parts, I've had a nightmare about that and I cried when I woke up. I'm definitely supposed to be a straight girl. Good to know I guess. Seriously though, Lance Bass has never looked so good. It's probably the inaccessible thing.

I really should be sleeping. Have to rest up for Tyler's visit!!!!!! Oh how I love my gays.

Off to read Harry Potter and pass out, so I'll leave you with this blatantly crude yet entertaining comic.

~Forever Yours

You Oughta Know By Now

2010-01-26T18:35:00.000-08:00

I was on a blog hiatus. I don't know if I'm using the term correctly, but in other words, I took a little break from les Mamelons de Capitaine Kirk. Not because I wanted to, but I was in a hostel and chose to not use an internet cafe... Actually I didn't have a computer at all. No matter, I enjoyed Seattle for the loverly city that it is. Stumbling about, admiring the downtown ambiance of people asking me for a dollar, a cigarette, or a phone number, none of which I gave out (I know, how selfish. Though the phone number was the only thing I had. Wasn't about to just pass out 20s!!)

Speaking of charity and giving, I am halfway through the book Half The Sky by Nicholas D. Kristof. I don't normally push books on people (though I really should encourage reading), but this Pulitzer Prize winning author created a real thought-evoking novel about opressed women and how some of these women overcome their ridiculous obstacles. I for one can't imagine some of the horrific events that are recounted in this book. So, long story short, READ IT!!!!! Seriously. Do it.

GOOD GOLLY GOSH IT'S TIME FOR EYE CANDY!!!!!!

That's right, it's time for Eye Candy. You weren't prepared because I was being all serious. I enjoy sneaking up on people like that. But sometimes I'm all "BOO!" and the sneaked person is all "Dude, boo is so 4th grade. It's all about the 'I'm pregnant' scare now" and then I don't think it's funny. It's ironic and probably true but not as funny as you would think. Seriously. Don't joke about that stuff, boys will pee their pants. Not like that's a new one.

SO, eye candy. Yep. Let's just move on to that shall we?

Black and White Eye Candy Seshhhh

Black and White again? Oh it's Ryan Reynolds, no one cares about coloring.

David Boreanazzzzz. Hey there boo

Tom Welling and tight shirts are good friends.

I think you all can be relatively satisfied with these. If not, please feel free to suggest any sexcelebrities that I may be missing

~Forever Yours

how to be a teenager {idea= nicoleisbetter}

2010-01-21T23:47:00.000-08:00

Being in my twenties sounds so incredibly glamorous. I ~~literally~~ ~~daily~~ occasionally am super uber thankful that I'm no longer a teenager, because to be honest, being a teenager was downright exhausting. Now that I'm in my twenties I must actually attune myself to responsibility and adulthood.... EW... But in all seriousness folks, being a teenager is difficult. We all know it. No matter what course you take in life, the teen years really hit hard. Sorry if this entire post is TMI and a tad emo. I was a teenager after all!But seriously. Don't judge. You had stuff like that too! This idea was inspired by Nicole. I didn't want to seem all creative on my own, but she doesn't have a copyright or anything. She really should.

So... whew... here goes!!

spoiler; there is a large amount of repetitiveness. feel free to skim

Turn 13. Be ecstatic that you're finally a teenager. Start dreaming up perfect prom experience. Get first real kiss. Run to the bathroom and wash face repeatedly. Go to first dance. Freak out because you don't know how to dance. Be awkward. Dance. Have first "boyfriend". Write in diary. Start getting hormonal. Get first "camp boyfriend". Write in diary in code.

Turn 14. Enjoy the feeling of maturity. Think about camp boyfriend. Write "Me+Camp Boyfriend forever" with hearts all over your journal. Go to school. Get note- "Cute Boy likes you". Think about cute boy. Forget about Camp Boyfriend. Write "Me+Cute Boy forever" with hearts all over your journal. Get grounded for the first time. Be angsty. Get first sex talk. Freak out. Hear where the condoms are. Freak out more. Get new secret boyfriend. Get broken up with for pretty more ~~sexually experienced~~ mature friend. Be pissed. Write about it on Myspace and in journal.

Turn 15. Enter high school. Go to all girls school because that's what parents wanted.Be sick of girls. Emo (lather, rinse, repeat). Think about friend's neighbor. See his motorcycle, muscles, and hair. Enjoy. Give number. Get first real boyfriend. Say "I love you". Believe it. Experience first high school backstabbing. Repeat backstabbing. Have romantic "perfect love" adventures. Drink. Fuck up. Experience first heartbreak. Lose friends. Love more. Transfer high schools. Be hit on. Feel weird. Try to be invisible. Sing in front of the whole school instead. Fail at invisibility. Wish you could just turn sixteen.

Turn 16. Get sweet sixteen jewelry . Get birth control for the first time. Discover more estrogen makes you a super bitch. Don't have birth control. Freak out. Repeat. Get first promise ring. Throw promise ring. Feel empowered. Go back to boyfriend anyway. Freak out about prom. Don't go to prom. Freak out about not going to prom. Miss middle school. Cry. Break up. Get angry at mom for letting you watch all those Disney movies glorifying love. Cry more. Feel empowered. Get back together. Repeat. A lot. Go on vacation with boyfriend's family. Love it. Hate it. Don't like his family. Feel bad. Break up. Get back together.

Turn 17. Go out of the country for the first time. With parents. Drink with parents for the first time. Like mom while drinking. Feel weird drinking around dad. Call boyfriend every waking minute. Sulk. Hot spiced wine. Experience first bar. Gross. Write junior paper. Do excellently. Break up. Cry. Get back together. Be angry. Go to prom. Think prom sucks. Go home. Break up. Flirt way into getting driver's license. Have first summer single in a while. Enjoy it too much. Feel bad. Feel good. Feel bad. Repeat. Get back together with now-college boyfriend. Feel like an adult.

Turn 18. Spend time with your girls. Feel good. Apply to colleges. Get in. Have intense "What College" discussions. Go to Southern California . Break up. Cry. Feel weird about moving. Graduate. Feel weird about graduating. Feel happy about being a legal adult. Feel bad about not being a 21-year-old legal adult. Go out of the country again (without parents). Have the best time of your life. Realize you can't do that forever. Wish you could. See ex-boyfriend. Get back together. Go to SoCal. Feel inadequate. Make the best friends ever. Drink. Study. Live. Talk to boyfriend. Break up. Cry less. Assume cycle will repeat as usual. Boyfriend gets new girlfriend. Feel weird. Feel free. Be happy for the first time in a long time. Go home. Miss friends.

Turn 19. Best friend sets you up with Handsome Boy. Be a little slutty. Don't feel bad. Hang out more with Handsome Boy and friends. Enjoy. Say yes to being his girlfriend. Be happy. Go on first real vacation with a boyfriend (without family). Enjoy. Have amazing summer with Handsome Boy and friends. Transfer schools. Miss best friends. Drink. Freak out. Go to new school. Meet five new roommates. Be awkward. Party with roommates. Be best friends. Have drama with roommate. Be petty. Talk shit. Get called out. Yell. Fix. Repeat. Get best grades you've ever had. Get broken up with. Cry. Sob. Party. Drink. Wish you could just fast forward to thirty and have everything "figured out".

Enter: TWENTY.

..... to be continued.

~Forever Yours

Dr. House is swingin', Jacob is a girl

2010-01-21T21:19:00.000-08:00

There's this website that's alllll about photoshopping and cool photography. www.worth1000.com. On an entirely unrelated note, I love Julie Andrews, she's what I want to be like when I'm older minus the throat surgery junk. Here's some stuff I enjoy from Worth1000 that I just can't save for later.

Sheer Awesome-Fantasticness

If I was in my mid-30's and Hugh Laurie dressed like this all the time... Well you know

I KNEW Jacob had long hair for a reason!

It's because I'm a Jew

Looks like Ugly Duckling needs a makeover

Tom Wellings face, Tom Cruises eye, Channing Tatums Mouth, Andy Garcias Nose= DAYUM FINE!

Seriously people, check this website out. It's fantastic. And if you're magic at photoshop or photography or writing or any artistic thing like that really, totally submit some stuff. It's pretty effing incredible.

Side Note-- Words that are hard to say when drunk are as follows: rural, cinnamon, slalom, mirage, orifices, crackerjack, loquacious, indubitably... Feel free to add more

~Forever Yours

People of Note

2010-01-21T15:48:00.000-08:00

So every year, there are always articles in magazines about "People of the Year", whether they are the most inspirational, the sexiest, or the most ridiculous people in that particular year. I think I'm going to put my vote down for the people I have the most confidence in for the coming year, some super famous, some not famous (yet).

My People

1) Mina Meman- She has been one of my best friends since high school, and this year is filming a documentary in her country of origin, Kurdistan. She's so ambitious, with one of her higher goals being being a Cardiothoracic Surgeon. If y'all don't know what that means, look it up. Love is the center of her life, not romantic love but purely love for her fellow human being, and that's truly inspirational. Plus, she's a fantastic dresser and dedicated to working out, while I shop at Forever XXI and walking around in the mall is a work out for me. Maybe I should like.. try to be her sometimes. Follow her on twitter!

2) Maddie Standish- Another one of my best friends, Maddie has kept me going through my absolutely shiteous relationships with men (boys rather) and friends alike. She is ALSO working on a film, this one is about strippers that began at a young age, and I quote;

I think that especially for these young girls there is a lot of emotional and psychological issues that funnel into the choice to become a stripper, and I'm interested to see how they view themselves in this light. Most importantly, I want audiences to see these girls not as skanky strippers but as real human beings that can be your best friend, sister, or classmate. I'm not out to tell them that they are wrong or right for what they do, I just want to understand why they do it.

She is one of the strongest and most ambitious people I know, and pretty much everything SHE posts on twitter is a thousand times more interesting than me. Follow her on twitter!

Out of my League

1) The Entire Cast of Glee- Alright so this is much more shallow than my first two inspiration person mentions, but Glee just might be one of the greatest shows on television since Sex and the City and F.R.I.E.N.D.S. Glee started last year, and is such an addicting show full of cheesy moments, well-known musical numbers, and ridiculous high school/adult drama. The whole cast will surely come very far, because I predict that if the network can afford it, this show will stay around for a long time. Or at least I hope it will. I'm a total ~~Geek~~ Gleek. Which is a nasty word by the way, I'm pretty sure the word gleek has something to do with spitting, and if you spit, STOP IT.

2) Robert Pattinson- I'm NOT just saying this because I'm totally in ♥celeblove♥ with him, but since his debut in Harry Potter, he's really been climbing the film ladder. My hope is that he'll suddenly develop incredibly charisma and become the next Heath Ledger without all the death. I also hope that he does more charity stuff, but right now he's a guy in his early 20's and you know how all those guys are...

And that's pretty much it for now. I would ~~never~~ totally become an escort for three days if they would take me to Coachella. Escorts get stuff paid for according to The Wedding Date. I mean seriously, they could pay for the hotel, festival pass, transportation ca$h, and all I would have to do is look dayum foiiiiine. It's an idea.

~Forever Yours

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

2010-01-20T18:43:00.000-08:00

People normally don't like pick-up lines, but I appreciate the ridiculousness of some of them. Here is my top 10 right now in no particular order :)

Oh, and Coke is better than Pepsi.

1. Odwalla smoothies totally count as dinner. If you disagree, feel free to take me out to dinner.- nicoleisbetter (Twitter)

2. I lost my virginity... can I have yours?

3. I heard your ankles were having a party... want to invite your pants down?

4. I'm addicted to yes, and I'm allergic to no. So what's it gonna be?

5. Oooh, you're lookin' fine. Not in the good way, in the "you'll do" way.

6. You know Platform 9 and 3/4? Well I know something else with the same exact measurements.

7."Hey baby, can I get some fries with that shake?" You know who doesn't have a sense of humour? Epileptics.- secretsquirrel (Twitter)

8. Honey, you've been looking for love in Alderaan places! (Whoops, nerd alert)

9. "My magical watch says you aren't wearing any underwear. Oh, you are? It must be an hour fast!"

AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE

10. Nice shoes, wanna fuck?

Obviously don't take me seriously. I don't approve of pick up lines, nor would I like ANYONE to try them. They're merely for my entertainment. Well, maybe a little bit for your entertainment too.
Here's some inspirational photos.

~Forever Yours

To sleep, perchance, to dream

2010-01-20T13:37:00.000-08:00

RUH ROH! It's been four days since my last post. I must punish myself by ingesting calories, and therefore gaining weight. Ultimately, the weight gain is the punishment. Or this whole ordeal is all about me really needing a Tall Java Chip Frappuccino. I'm not even going to tell you how long it took me to figure out how to spell frappuccino, but it wasn't fun.

I'm all about sharing, really I am. But seeing as I'm not as anonymous as I'd like to be, unfortunately I have to keep my stories relatively PG-rated and edited a tad. Or I could just do the typical "my FRIEND had a weird dream about one of her ex boyfriends (who sucks a lot), and my FRIEND was wondering if that meant anything at all... no seriously, it's my FRIEND." I'm not going to do that. Just kidding, I totally lied, I definitely am going to do that. Now something I don't understand is, though I'm majoring in psychology, why people refuse to think that dreams mean anything at all. I don't think dreams predict anything, but from experience I know that when I have a dream about something, I tend to think about that something, and because of said dream my life changes just a little bit. So, while I don't think dreams necessarily MEAN anything, I do think they are representations of things a person is thinking about. Obviously dreams are just the minds interpretation of random messages being sent around the brain while you're sleeping, but if your mind is interpreting a certain way, that speaks volumes.

Someone stole my secret!!

And now for something a tad more serious and monumentally more disturbing. I've just found out that the University of Oregon's EMU lets people hold conferences and such, and allows retired professors to reserve the area for speeches and whatnot, but a neo- Nazi group is holding conferences there regularly, spreading their narrow-minded beliefs. They haven't committed any actions, they're merely discussing things, but it still remains so unfair that any group could collectively hate and sit around on their racist butts and spread the ideals of the murderers and bigots that should have died out long ago. We are so incredibly above any sort of hate. And if you're wondering, no I do not hate the Nazi party. I am disappointed that any fellow human could repress all emotion, all sympathy for man, and destroy anyone who was different. What would our world be like if every person destroyed a type of person they didn't like? Well, the world wouldn't exist. Because no matter how great a person is, how pure and inspirational and seemingly close to perfect, someone will always not like that person. It's not fair, but it's life. Hate is such an extreme waste of energy, it's so damaging and does absolutely nothing productive. The fact that humans can hate is an embarrassment to our species as a whole. The most frustrating point that I've been avoiding in this entire paragraph is that because of how amazing America is, allowing us to have free speech, these ignorant people can sit around in one of the most liberal areas talking about how this race or these religious people or those who are different should be eliminated. All I have to say to them is, please, grow a pair and fix whatever the hell you think is wrong with yourself, because obviously you're not satisfied with your own life if you feel like you must take someone else's life. Geez.

What's going to help you breathe after that doozy? Is doozy even a word? The more I think about it, the more I believe I might've just made it up. Or spelled it wrong. It's all completely possible.

I found this next little article on some random Stumbled website. Being a woman, I still thoroughly enjoyed it. Y'all might not but you can feel free to express your dissatisfaction at my obvious appreciation of male bashing and sarcasm :)

~Forever Yours

Imaginarium-ing

2010-01-17T19:05:00.000-08:00

*Hello little monsters*
For some reason I have Peter's little tune stuck in my head

How incredibly old school
Now on to the more important issues. Issue number one, if you have not yet contributed in some way towards the aid efforts in Haiti, please do so. There's a link on the side of my blog, as well as many other ways you can help. Look around, opportunities are everywhere. For example, a little store in my hometown, Topanien, is giving 50 cents for EVERY sale made and asking customers to match her donation. It's a great cause, and here's something I definitely want :) Inspirational Banner
Issue number two, Imaginariums. I wish they were real. I have decided that if I entered The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, there would be a few things present. Music, obviously, would be consuming the entire world I would enter into. These other things would be hangin' out as well;

delicious decadent chocolate

red wine, so fiiiine

AND last but not least

sparkling items.... vampires count

I'm absolutely and entirely serious. What would your imaginaruim include? If you haven't seen the movie, you absolutely must, it's a complete adventure of the mind. Though to see Heath Ledger on the brink of death was a little trying. Because I am completely devoid of anything else interesting to say, please enjoy this short comic;.
~Forever yours

I can hear the bells

2010-01-12T21:35:00.000-08:00

You now are entering into a realm I hold most dear..... the realm of MUSIC
Music is my life. Any song can have an affect on me somehow, and music can take me to an entirely different place, a world where everything is a certain way. I could talk forever about how much I love music, but instead I would just like to let you into that world.

Good god my cat is going insane. I now have a scratch almost identical to Scar's.

Thing number one about music, I now have tickets to see Owl City !!!!!!!
Thing number two... Here's a few genre(ish)s of music I enjoy

Driving music
Mood: Open windows, warm breeze, alone
LA ROUX
COLIN HAY
THE POSTAL SERVICE

Getting ready music
Mood: Sexy, pumped, nervous, changing clothes more than three times to look just right
LADY GAGA
GLEE (Yes I'm serious)
CHRISTINA AGUILERA

And that's all for today folks, browse around, Pandora it all and make some new noise, yes?

I'll also sign off on the final note that "an eye for an eye" should also refer to good deeds. Normally when you do something nice for someone, they do something nice right back. So go at it all of you, buy someone coffee, write a letter, make a mix tape (well make a mix CD, no one uses tapes anymore). And definitely donate to Haiti, if you go to the Red Cross website, they have many ways for you to donate money to help rebuild everything :)
Spread the LOVE.

~Forever Yours

Just a TidBit... Hamsters...

2010-01-12T10:16:00.000-08:00

Hamsters can make pretty good distractions. I think if I could carry one around all day I wouldn't have to deal with human drama and I could just marvel at the fuzzy smallness of my little pet hamster. Unfortunately, I only get to hang out with a hamster when staying at my friend's apartment. Obviously changes need to be made. Hamsters are afraid of cats though, and from how my love life is going it's starting to look like I might have to make the move into crazy-cat-lady-dom, and I can't be a crazy cat lady without cats. I've never heard of a crazy hamster lady. I could start that now.

you would think this was a joke but it's a real action figure

Something I fail to understand is the rules of human relationships. And by human I mean between two humans, and by relationships I mean intimate. Sexual. Loving. Whatever kind of committed you would like to call it. But there are unspoken rules in these relationships, and I always wonder why these unspoken rules exist. When there is an unspoken rule, you don't speak of it, and therefore if someone doesn't understand or know about said unspoken rule, they fail to follow the rule because it wasn't spoken to them. How can that be something that makes sense? Do unspoken rules really exist at all? I feel like "don't light everything you see on fire, especially if it's living" is an unspoken rule, however some people (pyromaniacs if you will) light things on fire, and fail to understand the rule. There you go, I guess. Time to start speaking all the rules?
I know my father doesn't fail to speak the unspoken rules while he's driving. He is very verbal about blinkers, merging, and speed limits, even though he knows the other drivers can't hear him. However, he does make a convincing backseat driver.

Something I still cannot come to terms with is the abundance of breakups and twists and turns my generation's culture has had. First Barbie and Ken got a divorce, and Barbie met some hot new beach bro, but then dumped him for Ken again. Then there was the Jennifer Aniston Brad Pitt break up which was one of the worst. The Cookie Monster became the Veggie Monster. And Archie chose to marry Veronica! How dare he ever choose! I personally was always rooting for Betty, she could cook and clean and was smart and probably a great girlfriend. I'm not one to be into history or anything, but the love lives our generation has are so "effed up" (if I may). I've decided to concede from attempting at relationships to admire the inaccessible sexiness of Jeremy Piven. You all may enjoy him now as well.

Eye Candy

~Forever Yours

Visually Pleasing

2010-01-10T17:00:00.000-08:00

So currently, I'm sitting at home next to a fire having a Lord of the Rings marathon with mon pere. As I will be busy watching all of these movies, I'll entertain by sharing some of my favorite products of YouTube. Enjoyyyyyy :)

MUSIC

By Your Side (Cover by Autry)

Nom Nom Song

Anything I'm Not- Lenka

Beautiful People; Dancing in the Street Medley

TRES DROLE

The YES Dance

Russel Peters on Accents

Bon Qui Qui

Blood

FIERCE

Don't Piss Tyra Off

Thinking of You (Katy Perry Cover)- Nick Pitera

T-Mobile Dance

BANNED NEW MOON TRAILER

Top 60 Ghetto Black Names

AND FINALLY... THE WORST THING YOU'LL EVER WATCH

Click.... Here....

~Forever Yours

Light Up Brahhhhh

2010-01-08T20:24:00.000-08:00

Today I would like to review the trending topic on twitter, #ItsOverWhen. These are some of my favorites

We go to your crib and you got a twin bed

When dude ask mee to put mii finger n his butt

Son... #itsoverwhen your crib runs out of juice.#shitjustgotreal

The fat b*tch gets on top cuz dats when it all stops

Mistakingly step on my shoes... trying to laugh it off and shit

I run out of songs to play on my iTunes

We Spend a WHOLE HOUR arguing about Who invented sex!! i did lol

You a grown ass man wit a mohawk

When did twitter become to ghetto? I kid, I kid. Though I don't understand the appeal of spelling things wrong in order to seem "cooler" or more "bad ass" or whatever...

"Oh dark mother, once again I suckle at your smoky teet"... AKA On Smoking.

The world used to look upon smoking cigarettes as something suave and sexy. To have a cigarette was to have class and be debonaire, top of the world. Now that we've discovered the heinous results, smoking is frowned upon almost as equally as suicide but with less sympathy. No smoking ads become more "indie" and appealing to the younger generation, combating the campaigns of the cigarette conglomerates. Though, what really is the problem with experimenting? Sure, cigarettes cause lung cancer as well as other various problems, but that is usually if the smoker is an actual smoker ie; having many cigarettes throughout the day, craving them, and having withdrawals without. I'll admit I myself have an addiction. Though this addiction is to caffeine which is most likely one of the lesser drugs, I still get headaches and a less-than-desirable attitude when I don't get my daily dosage of Dutch Brothers or Starbucks. And I have had a good amount of cigarettes in my life, usually when under the influence of a less chastised substance (draaaaank). I don't think it's a horrible thing, but I don't find myself addicted either. My grandfather smoked cigarettes for over 25 years and is in his 80's and without lung cancer or any other adverse affects caused by smoking tobacco. Given this was a different time, but still, him and my grandmother were both unaffected by their dangerous habit. Like everything, I suppose it varies from person to person.

Signing off wishing you a good second weekend of January 2010!!!!

♥

Forever Yours

... And Now For Something Completely Different

2010-01-07T21:34:00.000-08:00

I think every time I write here, I'll have either a music, video, or image medley. Today I'm feeling image-y. So here is a menagerie of images I find entertaining, sorted into various categories.

MEANT TO INSPIRE

RELATED TO PERSONAL STATE OF MIND

THESE ARE A FEW OF MY FAVORITE THINGS

Forever Yours

Inane Asylum

2010-01-07T19:48:00.000-08:00

First order of business. Explanatory introduction. Not only does my blog title have astronomical amounts to do with the high attractiveness level of Captain James Tiberius Kirk in the new Star Trek film, but it also has to do with the inventive nature of Will Ferrell's various exclamations in his movies. Examples include "Captain Kirk's Nipples!", "Great Odin's Raven!", and the ever-recognizable "I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!" These accessed quotes would not be possible without the help of the people I've experienced so far in my college experience. College is an interesting period of time in one's life, especially in this day and age. Though I would like to point out, there is one factor that makes all the difference in everyone's individual experience- location, location, location. Let's say someone was going to school in Southern California. Their experience would most likely include the following; frat boys, tanning booths, Uggs, an good ol' Sailor Jerry. And seriously, come to terms with it, underage drinking is to college as illicit sex is to Tiger Woods. Absolutely rampant. Don't get me wrong, I'm not one to endorse breaking the law. Our generation tried the argument "If we can die in war, we should be able to drink", and the government shot back with "If you're enlisted in the military, you can drink". My argument is "If we are of age to vote ourselves into drinking privileges, your efforts seem pretty futile". I've gone off topic, though if you're planning on following these rantings, you may as well get used to it.

Speaking of generational situations, college roommates have always had an interesting place in everyone's experience, am I right? My first roommate, a friend from my high school years (not recommended), exhibited to me how incredibly free-spirited she was. The first party we attended together in fact, she exhibited herself to someone else as well (I jest pure-spiritedly of course). Sexual experiences are, in fact, a core element in college. Said roommate's intended one-night stand came a-knocking at our dorm room door at about 2 AM a couple nights after to leave her an indiscernible note and to have some soul-searching speech "with" me. It was really mostly him speaking at me until I found a courteous way to tell him to "get the [expletive] out of my room, pretty please with cherries on top". My second roommate is one of six of us, and furthest in personality from any of us to be completely honest. I will just say, from experience, any situation where more than 5 girls are stuck in the same place for an extended period of time, there will undoubtedly be some drama resulting from the simmering hormones. Needless to say, I'm almost led to believe living with a boy in the future will be easier.

I do sincerely apologize if this little tidbit is extraordinarily less than interesting for you all. But if you have any suggestions for what you want me to write about or any questions, please feel free to ask. I'm always open to change!

And here is your eye-candy for the day. Also, suggestions welcome

yummmm

~Forever Yours